tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5346102034731922562024-02-06T21:41:47.582-07:00Gray Matterit ain't brain surgeryUnknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger539125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-534610203473192256.post-27757293881766043722014-03-20T13:57:00.001-06:002014-03-20T13:58:18.071-06:00Warning Shots...Misfired<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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This kid.<br />
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<br />
IS SO GREAT.<br />
<br />
She's been sleeping through the night since she was about a month old, she smiles all the time and she only cries when she's hungry, tired, or needs a diaper change.<br />
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I'm not telling you this because I think I've found some secret to having a perfect child - I thank God every day because I realize it's not that way for everyone.<br />
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I'm telling you because I've noticed that when people find out I have an easy baby, they feel an overwhelming need to warn me that MY NEXT BABY IS GOING TO BE TERRIBLE.<br />
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<i>"She sleeps through the night? Just you wait - your next baby is probably going to spend the entire night screaming and punching you in the throat."</i><br />
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<i>"Oh your baby smiles a lot? Enjoy it now, because your next baby won't be physically capable of smiling; she'll just walk around looking like </i><a href="https://www.google.com/search?q=ice+T+law+%26+order&espv=210&es_sm=122&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ei=bQ0rU-XNEsHCqAHIhYDYCA&ved=0CAoQ_AUoAg&biw=1680&bih=935#q=ice+T+law+%26+order&spell=1&tbm=isch&imgdii=_" target="_blank"><i>Ice T during every episode of </i>Law & Order: SVU<i> ever made</i></a><i>."</i><br />
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<i>"You say she doesn't cry much? Don't get used to it - the only way to get your next baby to stop crying will be to blast Nickelback's Greatest Hits."</i><br />
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Of course this didn't begin after the baby came.<br />
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When I was pregnant, it was, <i>"Enjoy your freedom while you can! Once that baby comes you're gonna have to live in a cage."</i><br />
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And a few years before that, when we announced we were getting a dog, we heard a lot of,<i> "Oh you're getting a dog, huh? Better kiss all your favorite shoes goodbye." </i><br />
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To be fair, that last one turned out to have a ring of truth to it - but you know what? I'D DO IT ALL AGAIN. I knew when I signed up for this gig that it wasn't going to be easy, and a lot of times it's not, but just because something's hard doesn't mean it's bad.<br />
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I just don't think you can go through life in constant fear of whatever horrible thing is coming when your kid turns three (<i>"it's even WORSE than the terrible twos!"</i>) or thirteen (<i>"you might as well just lock her up until she's out of high school"</i>) or twenty three (<i>"she'll still be living at home, just watching your cable and eating all your cereal!"</i>) and come out sane at the other end. You just have to roll with whatever happens and enjoy the (many) good parts.<br />
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Speaking of which...<br />
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<br />Unknownnoreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-534610203473192256.post-56576758169615436612014-03-10T08:41:00.000-06:002014-03-10T08:41:24.384-06:00Nerd Alert<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br />
You guys.<br />
<br />
I got new glasses.<br />
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They are totally nerdy but that isn't the point.<br />
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The point is that they were CHEEEEAP!<br />
<br />
And I have my mom to thank for it! She told me about this website called Zenni Optical. It's awesome! They have all kinds of cute frames and you can upload a picture of yourself to see how the different frames will look on you.<br />
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I've been wearing the same pair of glasses for like four years because since I usually wear contacts, I always use up all my vision insurance money on those. Plus even after insurance, I feel like glasses always end up costing me like over a hundred bucks. BUT NOT THIS TIME!<br />
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These babies only set me back forty five smackers, including shipping.<br />
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I'm pretty happy about it.<br />
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<a href="https://www.zennioptical.com/" target="_blank">CLICK HERE</a> to check out the site. (I got style #628021 in case you want to be twinsies.)Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-534610203473192256.post-42217550532421924632014-03-04T09:09:00.001-07:002014-03-04T09:09:10.715-07:00Hey Baby<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
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<span style="text-align: left;">Seriously though...we should have had one of these a long time ago.</span></div>
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Carolina just turned three months old and is now entering what they call the "golden age" where she just laughs all the time and is generally in a good mood.<br />
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Sarah and I took her to the grocery store this weekend, and when we were standing in the baking aisle and she had fallen asleep in the Ergobaby, and I just looked at Sarah and said, "I am so happy right now...I think I could actually cry." </div>
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I don't know what triggered it, but I was suddenly overwhelmed by the fact that I finally had this little person I'd wanted for so long. </div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjvO32lz4XB-FnvyrQhJ53hVZsHgOtTDqvCp7vPKMa9FCcMgweBeZhr4lgk4bfyubiqIAs6TJqwKlDiSiWYsg99wKE3-aGQwFGcnWPBfBW4pOd_tNHmxA-soVUqu8gOTwL_v6OL8q1e0Zmk/s1600/IMG_0406.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjvO32lz4XB-FnvyrQhJ53hVZsHgOtTDqvCp7vPKMa9FCcMgweBeZhr4lgk4bfyubiqIAs6TJqwKlDiSiWYsg99wKE3-aGQwFGcnWPBfBW4pOd_tNHmxA-soVUqu8gOTwL_v6OL8q1e0Zmk/s1600/IMG_0406.JPG" height="426" width="640" /></a><span style="clear: left; color: black; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;">So there's a little extra sap for your Tuesday. :)</span></div>
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If you're looking for something a little manlier, head over to the <a href="http://ggrayshop.blogspot.com/" target="_blank">G. Gray blog</a> where we have lots of tools and wood shavings and no crying. </div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-534610203473192256.post-55704990461856877552014-02-23T10:42:00.000-07:002014-02-23T10:42:57.166-07:00Work Nowitski<span style="font-size: x-small;">The title of this post goes out to all the Mavs fans out there. To everybody else - sorry I'm a such a weirdo. </span><br />
<br />
After a full twelve weeks of maternity leave, I went back to work on Wednesday.<br />
<br />
I'm pretty sure I only cried like three times. The first was when I was dropping the baby off at daycare, closely followed by the first time someone tried to talk to me when I got to the office. Don't worry; it was totally professional and not at all embarrassing.<br />
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The third time happened when I was talking to Sarah so it doesn't really bother me. She's used to it since she sees me cry on the regular about things like how badly I want a Dr. Pepper. You probably think I'm joking, but I can assure you that is a real thing that has really happened.<br />
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Anyway, the rest of the week went pretty well. I'm sort of in the best possible situation since I really do love my job and I'm leaving my baby with my best friend who I trust completely and is a fantastic mom*, but it's still hard. It's exciting to be able to start and finish a project without stopping to feed her or change her or get spit up on…but then I think about how someone else is feeding her and changing her and getting spit up on and I'm like <i>awww</i>…<br />
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So I guess the moral of this story is that being a mom is making me even weirder than I already was.<br />
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<b><span style="font-size: large;">THE END</span></b><br />
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But not really! Here's a little postscript action for ya:<br />
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Carolina keeps waking up in the middle of the night crying because she accidentally rolled onto her side and can't figure out how to get down, or because she's inch-wormed her way into the corner of the crib and her head's all smushed up against the bumpers.<br />
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It happened this morning and Gary said something about her doing somersaults in there, so I was like, "Hey, maybe she'll be a gymnast! WAIT - do they ever let anyone do gymnastics in like really baggy sweats?"<br />
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">*She also happens to be a professional photographer, which doesn't suck. If you're gonna leave your kid with someone, it might as well be someone who will send you glamour shots all day long. </span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">Also she's the best cook I've ever met in real life. That doesn't really have anything to do with this except that this is my blog and I WILL SAY WHATEVER I WANT. </span></div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-534610203473192256.post-15964013796816989132014-02-18T16:04:00.002-07:002014-02-18T16:04:44.544-07:00THIS IS EXCITING!!!Gary and I are opening an Etsy shop!<br />
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This has been a dream of ours for a long time, and we could NOT be more excited. The majority of what we'll be offering is woodworking done by Gary Gray himself - cutting boards, clocks, bottle openers - and every once in a while you might also find something I made! Seriously you guys I AM SO EXCITED I CAN'T STAND IT.<br />
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The shop isn't live yet since we're still working on some final touches, but in the meantime we will be posting some behind-the-scenes stuff on our blog. You can check it out <a href="http://ggrayshop.blogspot.com/" target="_blank">HERE</a>.<br />
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I'll be sure to let you guys know when G. Gray officially opens for business. I think you're gonna love it!Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-534610203473192256.post-75044922375400656112014-02-14T08:46:00.001-07:002014-02-14T08:48:16.638-07:00Hang OutSeveral months ago, I saw <a href="http://www.remodelista.com/posts/diy-pink-macrame-plant-hanger" target="_blank">this tutorial</a> for hanging planters. I've never successfully kept a plant alive for more than a couple weeks (with the exception of <a href="http://verygray.blogspot.com/2011/07/votes-are-in.html" target="_blank">Gwyneth Plantrow</a>, may she rest in peace, who thrived for nearly 5 months before <a href="http://verygray.blogspot.com/2011/12/one-with-dead-body.html" target="_blank">her untimely death</a>) but I thought maybe if they were super cute I'd be motivated to water them.<br />
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The thing about plants is that they don't scratch at your bed or scream at the top of their lungs when they're thirsty, and so it goes that even though I went with succulents, which I sort of thought were impossible to kill, I ended up with three very nice looking hanging dirt planters in my living room.<br />
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They can be seen in the top left of this picture of Carolina being hilarious and adorable.<br />
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They probably would have stayed like that forever if my mom hadn't come up with such a GENIUS solution: FAKE PLANTS!<br />
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I didn't even bother taking the dead ones out. Seriously. I shouldn't be allowed to have plants.<br />
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So there they are! Safe, happy, and totally self-sufficient. And no one has to know they're not real! Well except for the whole internet I guess, but whatever.<br />
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P.S. Remember <a href="http://verygray.blogspot.com/2012/06/lets-table-that.html" target="_blank">this coffee table we made</a>? We're selling it! For just $250, you could take home a piece of (internet browsing) history! <a href="http://cosprings.craigslist.org/fuo/4332468955.html" target="_blank">CLICK HERE</a> to see the Craigslist ad.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-534610203473192256.post-90383532625468713642014-01-22T12:58:00.001-07:002014-01-22T13:01:06.884-07:00We'll Be Counting StarsI've been suffering from a little bit of cabin fever while on maternity leave.<br />
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Okay it's more than a little bit. It's like to the point that I frequently get the urge to run around the block screaming just so I can go outside. And y'all know I don't run.<br />
<br />
Anyway, I've been looking for some cheap projects to work on in between feedings and I found this himmeli wreath tutorial over at <a href="http://www.vintagerevivals.com/2014/01/geometric-himmeli-wreath-2-0.html" target="_blank">Vintage Revivals</a>. It was posted on my birthday so I'm pretty sure we were made for each other.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEguDDWalQ-64y0k_XY4ku5mASU2KoajMTD8nQRFZmB3OWsL_g5nKDn4Z508c5rwBkbf574x0z1tZv5YBwTIDiLJoNn-LkJ0rKafu_lvtKl9brtoMlgaaZW3gIxVPP1LNvW1_mU6fGSP5sZ4/s1600/IMG_0033.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEguDDWalQ-64y0k_XY4ku5mASU2KoajMTD8nQRFZmB3OWsL_g5nKDn4Z508c5rwBkbf574x0z1tZv5YBwTIDiLJoNn-LkJ0rKafu_lvtKl9brtoMlgaaZW3gIxVPP1LNvW1_mU6fGSP5sZ4/s1600/IMG_0033.JPG" height="426" width="640" /></a></div>
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It's made out of cocktail straws, floral wire and some oil-rubbed bronze spray paint I had out in the garage.</div>
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Because that's what I can afford to decorate with. </div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg1pYeiz66ltB8HRcH3ebTnaqIRpY0S5b3_IJD_STKyFt5Dh2Uhzf7jqKokjvImB1ocvJCO1f0dlwJJ5cu0QIHkuvmjX5tlf-5_8acYDtXAAzOzOHmcW8ukoP8aJ6Ds6dbSotbVT3TKni9w/s1600/IMG_0030.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg1pYeiz66ltB8HRcH3ebTnaqIRpY0S5b3_IJD_STKyFt5Dh2Uhzf7jqKokjvImB1ocvJCO1f0dlwJJ5cu0QIHkuvmjX5tlf-5_8acYDtXAAzOzOHmcW8ukoP8aJ6Ds6dbSotbVT3TKni9w/s1600/IMG_0030.JPG" height="426" width="640" /></a></div>
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I've been looking for something to put up in the big empty space over the computer for a while so I feel pretty proud of myself for doing it so cheaply.</div>
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I'm going to cry when we move out of this house. I love our living room. </div>
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<br /></div>
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In other news, here's Gary's favorite thing to do with Carolina when she falls asleep on him. </div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhbqa_S4jx4_3sODUHOrQmcGB7s9XIcNFmQ_Q70q3lruHT8O6x1arWVKAw8ljpzMUwT0_L8cuJMT0MQJwPTRH54N8_1uhAnG7Z_fK7hjEYPo5-cpDme59IEu_s_2wqz9QfyJeBhXIkheM9h/s1600/IMG_0026.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhbqa_S4jx4_3sODUHOrQmcGB7s9XIcNFmQ_Q70q3lruHT8O6x1arWVKAw8ljpzMUwT0_L8cuJMT0MQJwPTRH54N8_1uhAnG7Z_fK7hjEYPo5-cpDme59IEu_s_2wqz9QfyJeBhXIkheM9h/s1600/IMG_0026.JPG" height="426" width="640" /></a></div>
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If you're wondering what's all over his fingers, it's the oil-rubbed bronze spray paint we used on the wreath because he does all my dirty work.</div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-534610203473192256.post-22136999730642289382014-01-19T08:03:00.000-07:002014-01-19T08:05:47.072-07:00I had a BABY.I used to work with this girl who was...not the brightest. Whenever one of us had to explain to her where her lungs were (so no, that probably wasn't why her lower back hurt) or that North Texas and South Texas were not in fact two separate states, she would reply with, "I didn't finish high school, y'all; I had a BABY."<br />
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Just thought I'd share that little anecdote so you'd understand my new excuse for everything. "I didn't shower this week, y'all; I had a BABY." Two months ago, but whatever.<br />
<br />
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So I'm a mom now! I'm still trying to wrap my head around that. So many things are not what I expected - largely in a good way - like the actual process of <i>having</i> the baby, for example.</div>
</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
This is the part where I tell you that I was ABSOLUTELY TERRIFIED of giving birth. I was really dreading it because I felt like I was in for the worst pain of my life - possibly because 10,000 people told me it would be the worst pain of my life - and as excited as I was to meet my daughter, that didn't really sound like something I'd be into. Like, if there was any way I could avoid the worst pain of my life…that would be great. </div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
So I got an epidural…AND IT WAS AWESOME. Seriously. I slept through most of my labor and spent the time in between naps looking deep into Sarah's soul and extolling the virtues of the almighty drug in such a way that it would stay with her forever on a spiritual level. (Read: I grabbed her arm and said, "Sarah. This is the way to do it." about a thousand times. Apparently.)</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Anyway I'll spare you the details, but the baby came out and then they just handed her over to us with the expectation that we were equipped to keep her alive.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg2NWDTinl_oVRdxh8IBxbk3IlRKpg2ZoRVLSVr98awYaMwobmB_1k5dFMvALTvmucHfRs63AgdaiLxpjUx35gDDfvTt7QB5p1IfGojmEjrftN32CiaetfW4nBGuckfsKUekU_P1AbTkLdv/s1600/IMG_2160.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg2NWDTinl_oVRdxh8IBxbk3IlRKpg2ZoRVLSVr98awYaMwobmB_1k5dFMvALTvmucHfRs63AgdaiLxpjUx35gDDfvTt7QB5p1IfGojmEjrftN32CiaetfW4nBGuckfsKUekU_P1AbTkLdv/s1600/IMG_2160.jpg" height="640" width="478" /></a></div>
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So far so good on that front, by the way. Our secret is that we check to make sure she's still breathing about every five seconds while she sleeps. </div>
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<br /></div>
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I know, I'm kind of awesome at parenting already. Tune in next week for advice on how to bounce your baby in such a way that her crying doesn't drown out the West Wing - because seriously…watching the West Wing is all I do now.</div>
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-534610203473192256.post-1802696185335457222013-10-22T10:07:00.000-06:002013-10-22T10:07:04.010-06:00What's Up, Doc?This morning we went to meet a potential pediatrician my OB* recommended. She told us about how if we decided to go with her, she'd come to the hospital when Carolina's born to see how she's doing and then do all her well-baby appointments after that. <br />
<br />
When she asked if we had any questions, we looked at each other, shrugged and said, "Not really," to which she laughed a little and responded, "Well you guys seem pretty laid back, that's great!" <br />
<br />
I didn't say this out loud, but I was sort of like...well you're a doctor, right? You like...went to school for a really long time? 'Cause I didn't even finish college. So I'm pretty much just gonna do whatever you tell me. <br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: x-small;">*Who I love by the way. Because she lets me do whatever I want. Like when I asked if it was okay for me to go up into the mountains to work a marriage retreat at 38 weeks (people are generally discouraged from making any major changes in altitude that close to their due date because of preterm labor concerns) and she said, "It's in Buena Vista? What's that, like 2 hours away? Sure, you'll be in labor wayyy longer than that."</span>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-534610203473192256.post-14114776055004032572013-10-16T11:54:00.000-06:002013-10-16T11:54:06.518-06:00High Dropout RateMy earrings keep falling out. And I'm not just talking about the kind that has a curved hook and no support on the back end - I'm talking about the ones with backs on them. THIS IS SERIOUS.<br />
<br />
I'll just be walking along, minding my own business, and <strike style="font-weight: bold;">BAM</strike> <i>clink! </i>I hear my earring hit the floor. And y'all KNOW it's not a result of any rigorous physical activity on my part.<br />
<br />
I am a (mostly) rational person, so I know this can't actually have anything to do with pregnancy...but there is a tiny part of me that's like...what if it has EVERYTHING to do with pregnancy? <br />
<br />
Who knows? All kinds of weird changes happen to your body when you're growing a baby (like <a href="http://www.babycenter.com/0_vision-changes-during-pregnancy_1456567.bc" target="_blank">temporary eyesight impairment</a>, which I did not see coming*) so who's to say this isn't just a pregnancy-related phenomenon that has yet to have been properly documented? <br />
<br />
A quick Google search indicates that I seem to be the first one to notice the correlation. This can only mean one of two things:<br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
1. I will go down in history as the woman who made one of the least important discoveries of all time - even if it's only your browser history.<br />
<br />
2. It is a coincidence and I need to get a life.</blockquote>
BUT IT'S PROBABLY NUMBER ONE.<br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: x-small;">*Even <em>before</em> my vision got worse. Ba-dum-CHING!</span>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-534610203473192256.post-6128640443903065902013-10-09T11:29:00.000-06:002013-10-09T11:29:47.305-06:00Someone Saved My Life TonightOr like...last week. Whatever, I've been busy.<br />
<br />
Okay. Here's the sitch, Mmmelody Bostic.<br />
<br />
Last Thursday I got into my car to go home for lunch. <br />
<br />
Saw this on my dashboard. <br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgvEHOiigZRTmyhfeaYjP8fvuUXq1_XQxhDQobOfVYiKlQBtMnK-h87itr8uyNByktf8HknGGxAZOMyASJFTeHfY2QI6YZEQjbAZz-sIIpLTpgNykxs9leJfPu1Eubf35gpysMxBjvo34bZ/s1600/two.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgvEHOiigZRTmyhfeaYjP8fvuUXq1_XQxhDQobOfVYiKlQBtMnK-h87itr8uyNByktf8HknGGxAZOMyASJFTeHfY2QI6YZEQjbAZz-sIIpLTpgNykxs9leJfPu1Eubf35gpysMxBjvo34bZ/s640/two.jpg" width="502" /></a></div>
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Freaked the eff out and frantically exited the car.</div>
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Stood there feeling stupid for a few seconds.<br />
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Called Sarah and she came down and rescued me because she is a fearless Amazon. <br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhoO_xhkjyXgsOZrSYI4U7xaQQsDYItxC_2uEOc5DkJz-3j4oRMDyzC3wNtCGoBTYMxpNZcVywAiwKZGboieYS5k1bXVeFoNmQjbn00FffZNO_HS21R1Q40F2cqnVZFsTrk0GxGyYC9YXhH/s1600/IMG_1674.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhoO_xhkjyXgsOZrSYI4U7xaQQsDYItxC_2uEOc5DkJz-3j4oRMDyzC3wNtCGoBTYMxpNZcVywAiwKZGboieYS5k1bXVeFoNmQjbn00FffZNO_HS21R1Q40F2cqnVZFsTrk0GxGyYC9YXhH/s640/IMG_1674.jpg" width="476" /></a></div>
<strong>THE END</strong>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-534610203473192256.post-32911146982308939222013-10-02T10:20:00.001-06:002013-10-02T10:21:35.983-06:00A Couple of Things<strong>ONE</strong><br />
<br />
This weekend a lady offered me her seat on a shuttle and I just stood there staring at her confusedly for several seconds, thinking, <em>"Lady, I am way younger than you. Why are you offering me your---OHHHH it's because of this gigantic belly."</em><br />
<br />
<strong>TWO</strong><br />
<br />
Since the forecasted high is 48 on Friday, I finally had to break down and get some shoes that are not sandals. <br />
<br />
I was just looking for some black flats and ended up getting these:<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj1EkRqIchAWfGvkZeKe84mnGrbwNMWwpG9r5bR9j2fVvsIxb8uoK_51MKfNNpQnnPlPFupoSzDKXrAtKqqgflJnL6bRs5m0DoNYqKtuusUWkHFFDhrMG42pWUamaHKYVDOWBuDXDWD5dRn/s1600/flats.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="426" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj1EkRqIchAWfGvkZeKe84mnGrbwNMWwpG9r5bR9j2fVvsIxb8uoK_51MKfNNpQnnPlPFupoSzDKXrAtKqqgflJnL6bRs5m0DoNYqKtuusUWkHFFDhrMG42pWUamaHKYVDOWBuDXDWD5dRn/s640/flats.JPG" width="640" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.payless.com/store/home/home.jsp" target="_blank"><strong>via</strong></a></td></tr>
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I never would have tried them on if I hadn't seen this ad because - get ready to think I'm a freak - I have spent years being terrified of scrunchy shoes. I just always assumed they would be super uncomfortable because they'd be too tight around the front and back since you have to stretch them out to put them on. <br />
<br />
But what ACTUALLY happens is that they are so flexible that they don't cut into your feet like normal shoes, so they felt broken in the first time I put them on. (For the record I am not receiving any money from Payless...I just really like cheap, comfortable shoes.)<br />
<br />
Aren't you glad you took time out of your day to read this? Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-534610203473192256.post-7886826932376521962013-09-25T13:52:00.000-06:002013-09-25T13:52:36.567-06:00salt SALT salt<span style="font-size: x-large;">SALT-</span><span style="font-size: large;">SALT-</span>SALT-<span style="font-size: x-small;">SALT-</span><span style="font-size: xx-small;">SALT </span><strong>SALT N PEPA'S HERE!</strong><br />
<br />
Just kidding. It's salt and caramel. <br />
<br />
Sorry, sometimes 90's pop songs take over my body and I'm suddenly unable to communicate like a normal human. <br />
<br />
I should start by telling you that I am a latte person. Like, I can drink regular coffee...as long as it's mixed with a gallon of flavored creamer and ten sugars and no longer even remotely resembles coffee. <br />
<br />
This explains why, even though Gary makes a perfectly good pot of coffee every morning (assuming such a thing exists) I justified nursing a Dutch Bros. habit <em>far</em> longer than I could afford it. I always had some vague plans in the back of my mind to buy an espresso machine and a steaming wand someday so I could start making lattes at home, but until then it seemed to make more sense to just spend $4 a day on something that isn't even food. <br />
<br />
I know. I'm the reason we're poor. <br />
<br />
Anyway, I recently discovered that you TOTALLY do not need any of that expensive equipment to make lattes at home. Like legit, delicious ones. All you need is a pot, a whisk and a regular old coffeemaker.<br />
<br />
LET'S DO THIS THING.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg9kCS5NsEQTSHmAc9bOVPn5Bz5ZIx-rbceHY1qXFAudcXwJiT4N-eDvF7pMnT6WLpgZNnryhKFP8hfWvH8Pf7seoxBEP0OnmtJYv1N9oDl8svduA5Mbs3UoKxv74zQL2qYW32q36lYoJNI/s1600/mug2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg9kCS5NsEQTSHmAc9bOVPn5Bz5ZIx-rbceHY1qXFAudcXwJiT4N-eDvF7pMnT6WLpgZNnryhKFP8hfWvH8Pf7seoxBEP0OnmtJYv1N9oDl8svduA5Mbs3UoKxv74zQL2qYW32q36lYoJNI/s640/mug2.jpg" width="478" /></a></div>
<strong><span style="font-size: large;">Salted Caramel Mocha</span></strong><br />
<br />
<strong>Ingredients</strong><br />
1 cup milk<br />
1/4 cup coffee (Gary makes his pretty strong so you may decide you need more)<br />
2 tbsp Torani Salted Caramel Syrup (I bought this at Walmart so it shouldn't be too hard to find)<br />
1 tbsp Hershey's Chocolate Syrup<br />
<br />
<strong>Directions</strong><br />
Combine all ingredients in a small pot and heat over medium heat, whisking regularly until hot. <br />
<br />
AND THAT'S IT. <br />
<br />
It is seriously the easiest thing ever and I can't believe it's taken me this long to figure it out. It takes about the same amount of time you would spend in a drive thru somewhere. Obviously you can use this formula for whatever flavor you want - it's also really good with the <a href="http://verygray.blogspot.com/2013/09/and-everything-nice.html" target="_blank"><strong>pumpkin spice syrup</strong></a> I posted a couple weeks ago.<br />
<br />
If you want to get crazy, throw down a little whipped cream, caramel sundae syrup and sea salt on top...and then immediately eat it with a spoon because you can't put the lid on your travel mug and also because eating whipped cream off a hot drink is like the best thing I can think of right now. Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-534610203473192256.post-67995641014042287552013-09-24T09:55:00.000-06:002013-09-24T09:58:05.216-06:00I'm One of THOSE MomsI'm going to start this post out by saying that I am not crazy. <br />
<br />
But there is at least one person at The Classical Academy (a charter school here in Colorado Springs) who was recently convinced otherwise. <br />
<br />
The following is a real email that a real person really had to send me (as well as what she was thinking as she wrote it in red).<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
Dear 2019 Kinder waitlist parents, <span style="color: red;">I'm just being nice here. There's only one of you and your name is Emily Gray.</span> </blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
It’s come to my attention that you have waitlisted your child for TCA, but unless you meant to put 2012 (and not 2013) as the birth year, he or she is not yet born. <span style="color: red;">I can't believe I'm actually having to explain this to you.</span> </blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
I have to decline any entry that comes in before a child’s actual birthdate. <span style="color: red;">Because who signs their kid up for preschool before they're even born? CRAZY PEOPLE WHO HAVE NOTHING BETTER TO DO THAN BE A PAIN IN MY ASS, THAT'S WHO.</span> </blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
I love how pro-active you are being,<span style="color: red;"> (</span><span style="color: red;">NO I DON'T)</span> but kids have to be “external” before they can be listed. <span style="color: red;">You moron.</span> <span style="font-family: Wingdings;">J</span> <span style="color: red;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri","sans-serif"; font-size: 11pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-bidi; mso-fareast-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-language: EN-US; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">←</span></span><span style="color: red;">Intentionally condescending emoticon.<br /><!----intentionally--></span><br />
<u>Here’s the link</u> for you to use after your baby’s arrival! <span style="color: red;">Don't even bother clicking this; your kid is never getting into our school. </span></blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
Blessings on your last few months of counting down! <span style="color: red;">You better hope your baby is pretty, 'cause she's probably going to be stupid.</span> </blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="color: red;"> </span>Sherry</blockquote>
Okay, I can explain. I keep hearing how hard it is to get kids into a decent school in this town, so pretty much as soon as I found out what gender I was having I went ahead and filled out an application using my due date as the date of birth.<br />
<br />
So I guess if that makes me a crazy person, well...there you have it.<br />
<br />
Whatever. If Carolina ends up in public school maybe she can make a little money using the skills she learns in meth lab. I mean chem lab.</div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-534610203473192256.post-35939323692227822132013-09-23T14:30:00.002-06:002013-09-23T15:16:06.204-06:00Soup-a-LooooopI get sort of excited when I have food cravings. For so long all I had were aversions and I started to think maybe this pregnancy thing wasn't all it's cracked up to be. It turns out it IS; I just hadn't gotten to the good part yet.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiefQcvs5JPuJChgrBIWNPzjWWYx_XJGGJxwkoVAJ9zpyroydZKumcxbnkqpde1owGT14bH16P-A-xdBVtol70D1ckfdd4zD01fyST3W1L9KfKwv1TuU4rllAjtGNozJT1TON7FNR3jPdOw/s1600/Capture.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="303" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiefQcvs5JPuJChgrBIWNPzjWWYx_XJGGJxwkoVAJ9zpyroydZKumcxbnkqpde1owGT14bH16P-A-xdBVtol70D1ckfdd4zD01fyST3W1L9KfKwv1TuU4rllAjtGNozJT1TON7FNR3jPdOw/s400/Capture.JPG" width="400" /></a></div>
And by the good part I mean the part where I get to eat almost an entire order of Louie's cheesy bread by myself and no one can judge me for it because I'm growing a baby.<br />
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Anyway, one craving that hit me hard last week was for the Blonde Lager and Smoked Gouda soup from <a href="http://phantomcanyon.com/" target="_blank"><strong>Phantom Canyon</strong></a>. </div>
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I like getting that and the pub salad with honey beer mustard as a meal because it allows me to order something with the word beer in it without actually having to drink a beer. </div>
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</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<em>"Oh I would totally order a beer with this, but I'm already eating two things with beer in them so I don't want to overdo it. It definitely has nothing to do with the fact that I'm a small child and can't handle the taste of beer</em>." </div>
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</div>
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Say beer again. </div>
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</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
BEER.</div>
<br />
Anyway, since I'm too poor to go out to eat I was SO excited to discover that they released the recipe a few years back and that it was <a href="http://m.rockymountainnews.com/news/2007/Mar/28/smoked-gouda-soup-from-phantom-canyon-brewing-co/" target="_blank"><strong>posted online</strong></a> that I was compelled to drive all the way across town to Whole Foods* (apparently smoked gouda is way too fancy to hang out at my Walmart Neighborhood Market). <br />
<br />
Saturday night was the night. As per the directions, I brought the beer, chicken stock and potatoes to a boil, turned the heat to medium, covered the pot and set a timer for 90 minutes and started watching <em>The First Wives Club</em> on Netflix. BECAUSE I FOLLOW DIRECTIONS BLINDLY. Also I love Goldie Hawn. <br />
<br />
But right around the part where they fall down the side of the building in the window washer cart, I was like, "<em>Hold up...it smells like...<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U5deItDV0k8" target="_blank"><strong>burning</strong></a></em>." <br />
<br />
I ran into the kitchen to find that all the liquid had evaporated, leaving only a few charred pieces of potato cemented to the bottom of the pot. As it turns out, you can't <em>simmer</em> something for 90 minutes on medium heat; you can only <em>continue to boil the crap out of</em> it. <br />
<br />
So then I cried a river of disappointed tears and Gary took me to Jason's Deli to ease my pain (because I wasn't kidding about not being able to afford to eat at Phantom Canyon) and also maybe to let the house air out a little. <br />
<br />
ANYWAY. I'm totally over it because we tried again on Sunday and IT TURNED OUT PERFECTLY. Luckily the only casualties in the first go 'round were the chicken stock, one beer and a few potatoes, so my $9 wedge of <strike>solid gold</strike> snobby cheese hadn't gone to waste. <br />
<br />
It was so good I sort of wanted to die. It is surprisingly filling, to the point that I served it with some breadsticks and no meat and even Gary Gray Himself was satisfied.<br />
<br />
So for real this time, here is a recipe that you are free to follow without fear because I love you enough to tell you that it only needs to simmer for 45 minutes.<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgqdZ4Ur_cgIrGm6WdDmPf3CT6hbeJhmXlQBouNzytRXu8QLM9FBCaloJjKtacPXOPzImWY61StepPpVu-VisFIQvqQ7rUb1Rhwbpk5_NrT1rI-irbjxyk_Y41kr0oVtzZW13XNszJWjNBz/s1600/cheese-soup.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgqdZ4Ur_cgIrGm6WdDmPf3CT6hbeJhmXlQBouNzytRXu8QLM9FBCaloJjKtacPXOPzImWY61StepPpVu-VisFIQvqQ7rUb1Rhwbpk5_NrT1rI-irbjxyk_Y41kr0oVtzZW13XNszJWjNBz/s640/cheese-soup.jpg" width="476" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">I didn't take this picture...but <a href="http://kellythekitchenkop.com/2011/09/friday-food-flop-smoked-gouda-blonde-ale-soup-recreating-restaurant-food-not.html" target="_blank"><strong>this lady</strong></a> did. AND she's the reason I found the recipe in the first place.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<strong><span style="font-size: large;">Smoked Gouda and Blonde Ale Soup</span></strong><br />
Serves 4<br />
<br />
1 (12-ounce) bottle of blonde ale (I used Shiner Light Blonde)<br />
<br />
3 cups chicken stock <br />
<br />
1/2 to 3/4 pounds Yukon Gold potatoes, peeled and diced small<br />
<br />
Bay leaf<br />
<br />
1 pint heavy cream<br />
<br />
3/4 pounds smoked Gouda cheese, grated<br />
<br />
Salt and pepper, to taste<br />
<br />
1. In a large heavy soup pot, bring beer, chicken stock and potatoes to a boil; add bay leaf.<br />
<br />
2. Reduce heat to low, cover and simmer until potatoes become very tender (about 45 minutes).<br />
<br />
3. Slowly whisk in the heavy cream and allow soup to gently boil, uncovered, until it starts to thicken, stirring occasionally. Remove the bay leaf.<br />
<br />
4. Add the shredded cheese and whisk briskly until it melts. Season with salt and pepper to taste.<br />
<br />
The original recipe says to puree with a stick blender or food-processing wand and then strain through a fine mesh strainer, but I didn't really think that was necessary since the potatoes totally disintegrated just from the whisking.<br />
<br />
Not to mention the fact that I was less than inclined to do anything the original recipe told me since I'd been burned - quite literally - by it once already. <br />
<br />
Whatever, I'm not bitter. AND NEITHER IS THIS SOUP. IT'S AMAZING.<br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: x-small;">*Speaking of Whole Foods...you should read </span><a href="http://www.huffingtonpost.com/kelly-maclean/surviving-whole-foods_b_3895583.html" target="_blank"><span style="font-size: x-small;"><strong>this article</strong></span></a><span style="font-size: x-small;"> if you like to laugh.</span>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-534610203473192256.post-81420390578553539172013-09-19T10:25:00.000-06:002013-09-19T10:25:10.283-06:00Snacks on Snacks on SnacksY'all.<br />
<br />
You HAVE to try this stuff. It's kind of like crack except it's slightly less habit-forming. <br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgJJJK2b9rM17pPOLzKyjAIYDP77uMcFOLzQcd957d9W6yjeg2FXw1g9Bufbm30G47OGgEXs2qOohWfpj2th5eGPT7L0m0hfzo9ZXuEEJiQ4kR1HI8Tv5luodooIq2fiZsCe2su6yyRfhtJ/s1600/015.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgJJJK2b9rM17pPOLzKyjAIYDP77uMcFOLzQcd957d9W6yjeg2FXw1g9Bufbm30G47OGgEXs2qOohWfpj2th5eGPT7L0m0hfzo9ZXuEEJiQ4kR1HI8Tv5luodooIq2fiZsCe2su6yyRfhtJ/s640/015.JPG" width="640" /></a></div>
Okay that's a lie; it's exactly the same amount of habit-forming. So basically it's just like crack, but without all that annoying kidney and lung damage.* (I can't make any promises about the tooth decay, so enjoy responsibly.)<br />
<br />
Here's what you need to do: Mix equal parts candy corn and cocktail peanuts and then FREAK OUT BECAUSE IT IS SO DELICIOUS.<br />
<br />
Also, this part is optional but it totally tastes better if you eat it out of a mug with your face on it. <br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhBEDVgwlUzGaFcsr9jYq1CFsUNqqydfCs-Yt_0zqSpPOU1LJJygtpvZgeFCNtYWiIFf7ZX_RQmZ8fK6qOBCTxzWyM3s4fHfzjht5bvvwdSnzCs8nKh-wAVuaHJF6TghXNOGzNOXCM2WST0/s1600/018.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhBEDVgwlUzGaFcsr9jYq1CFsUNqqydfCs-Yt_0zqSpPOU1LJJygtpvZgeFCNtYWiIFf7ZX_RQmZ8fK6qOBCTxzWyM3s4fHfzjht5bvvwdSnzCs8nKh-wAVuaHJF6TghXNOGzNOXCM2WST0/s640/018.JPG" width="640" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">*I had to look up what the </span><a href="http://www.drugfreeworld.org/drugfacts/crackcocaine/effects-of-crack-cocaine.html" target="_blank"><span style="font-size: x-small;">long-term effects of crack cocaine</span></a><span style="font-size: x-small;"> are because no one ever offered me drugs. I don't know, I was in show choir. </span></div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-534610203473192256.post-46881491617075099522013-09-18T10:49:00.000-06:002013-09-18T10:49:29.951-06:0030 WeaksUm...I know how to spell weeks. I was just trying to be punny, but every time I do that a panicky voice takes over my brain and tells me <em>PEOPLE WILL THINK YOU'RE STUPID IF YOU DON'T EXPLAIN THAT YOU'RE JOKING. </em><br />
<em></em><br />
Sarah often tells me I should give people more credit and just trust that they'll understand because my friends are all smart...BUT THAT'S THE PROBLEM. I am aware that there are all these smart people reading the blog and I JUST WANT TO TRICK YOU INTO THINKING I'M ONE OF YOU.<br />
<br />
So anyway, sorry I'm less concerned with whether or not I'm insulting your intelligence than I am with covering my own ass - which brings me quite literally to my actual point.<br />
<br />
I hit 30 weeks last Thursday and BAM! Just like that, none of my clothes fit. <br />
<br />
Dresses I've been comfortably wearing this entire time are suddenly obscenely short - but not <em>quite</em> short enough to pass off as a shirt, rendering them completely useless. I tried to wear leggings under one of them yesterday and I can't confirm this, but I'm pretty sure they were trying to choke my baby, which frankly is just rude.<br />
<br />
All the long shirts I was hoping would get me through the pregnancy are failing miserably, creeping stubbornly back up above my belly button no matter how many times I tug them back down and threaten to cut them up and add them to Gary's pile of oil rags in the garage.<br />
<br />
Oh and jackets? Forget about it. This isn't as big of a concern since my average body temperature is about 10,000 degrees, but that doesn't mean it doesn't hurt to see all my zippers cowering in fear and ducking around corners at the sight of me. <em>ARE YOU GUYS CALLING ME FAT???</em><br />
<br />
Basically I'm just trying to give you a heads up as to why I will exclusively be wearing curtains for the next 10 weeks. I shouldn't really complain - I mean, at least I'll be the only person who can say they bought their outfit at Ikea.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-534610203473192256.post-43556501876612257922013-09-17T10:42:00.000-06:002013-09-17T10:42:07.443-06:00Pregnancy Brain is RealLast night someone asked me what I was going to name my baby and I said, "California. I MEAN CAROLINA." <br />
<br />
Eh, they're both coastal states. Close enough.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-534610203473192256.post-46336058084481927952013-09-13T11:23:00.000-06:002013-09-13T11:23:03.979-06:00Ugh.<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg3qb71JokzHSrhB56czesH01Gqm8aVUHb3NObiVgiJCOrjQRHh11V-emBirQ2uueccBcTLH66dTvGFP2yLl9IcKOBz0H5hlFSmrOs1FAksV_NUl__vQiNZBEDJAoxiTaM3ZtAeDO8lvFR4/s1600/998303_510566745678051_1382978846_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="426" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg3qb71JokzHSrhB56czesH01Gqm8aVUHb3NObiVgiJCOrjQRHh11V-emBirQ2uueccBcTLH66dTvGFP2yLl9IcKOBz0H5hlFSmrOs1FAksV_NUl__vQiNZBEDJAoxiTaM3ZtAeDO8lvFR4/s640/998303_510566745678051_1382978846_n.jpg" width="640" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=510566745678051&set=a.379992078735519.84968.379985588736168&type=1&theater" target="_blank"><strong>via</strong></a></td></tr>
</tbody></table>
Okay, could we just not? With all the flooding? It is insane. <br />
<br />
My dad sent me this picture yesterday and I was like, <em>"Wow, it must be bad, that tree is all muddy."</em><br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi7gpr_e4ih_bAur9Khl3mjMOwT-GyA5ZbmEpFd3yiI6AQ8UhZUV0x2pbiyhm3_QvVMz4B3-ngeofFpvjXozAUI5LTKlHfItTX5HusbHU8OrlusN0sKzK8fXakzDtGDzGf6PtVKZ-ndgx3B/s1600/20130912__manitou-springs-flooding~p1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="478" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi7gpr_e4ih_bAur9Khl3mjMOwT-GyA5ZbmEpFd3yiI6AQ8UhZUV0x2pbiyhm3_QvVMz4B3-ngeofFpvjXozAUI5LTKlHfItTX5HusbHU8OrlusN0sKzK8fXakzDtGDzGf6PtVKZ-ndgx3B/s640/20130912__manitou-springs-flooding~p1.jpg" width="640" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><strong><a href="http://water-closes-all-roads-into-manitou-springs/" target="_blank">via</a></strong></td></tr>
</tbody></table>
Then I realized it wasn't a tree.<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;">
<iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="480" src="//www.youtube.com/embed/y_Hgcl2ltSg" width="640"></iframe></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
</div>
Thankfully I live downtown, which is apparently the only place in Colorado Springs that is safe from natural disasters. I mean we're 600% more likely to get mugged than the average bear, but as far as fires and flooding (and yeah, now that we're on the subject - bears) are concerned, we're golden. Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-534610203473192256.post-35529773841492180652013-09-11T10:34:00.000-06:002013-09-11T11:21:22.095-06:00I Get to Put This Under the Tray!Okay so remember <a href="http://verygray.blogspot.com/2013/08/two-things.html" target="_blank"><strong>about a month ago</strong></a> when I told y'all about that website <a href="http://scoutfit.com/" target="_blank"><strong>Scoutfit</strong></a> where you can track items you want and it'll tell you when they go on sale? <br />
<br />
Well now I have one more reason to love them. A few weeks ago I got an email from them saying that if I would participate in a short conference call to improve the site, they would send me a $50 gift card to the retailer of my choice.* <br />
<br />
Part of me was like, "<em>Psh, yeah right. Scam</em>." <br />
<br />
But then this other part of me was like, "<em>I need a dress for my cousin's wedding and I have no money to pay for it.</em>"<br />
<br />
So at the risk of getting an email virus and spamming all my Gmail contacts, I responded that I would love to <strike>get a $50 gift card</strike> help them improve their site for completely selfless reasons.<br />
<br />
I called in for the conference call and answered a few questions about how I shop online and how I use Scoutfit. Even after hearing that there were real people on the other end of the conference call, I still had my doubts as to whether or not I'd ever actually get the gift card, but I figured since the call only took up 30 minutes of my life, it wasn't that big of a deal.<br />
<br />
So you can imagine my elation when THIS came in the mail yesterday!<br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgMFVtZak0CuS8h-Rla0vrHCk4lixX2ZtLywHFCmN3tvlQs2SroF1jNqaJAxLp4T5X7Jb03ZaKzPHy3YD-s06tWzPy6xWQM6UMashES8hEgCrIiqvaV_Z4UZVZsYWL6fk82oFVMHGHiCiv_/s1600/005.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgMFVtZak0CuS8h-Rla0vrHCk4lixX2ZtLywHFCmN3tvlQs2SroF1jNqaJAxLp4T5X7Jb03ZaKzPHy3YD-s06tWzPy6xWQM6UMashES8hEgCrIiqvaV_Z4UZVZsYWL6fk82oFVMHGHiCiv_/s640/005.JPG" width="640" /></a><br />
The moral of this story is that you should do everything I say because it might just get you fifty free dollars. <br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: x-small;">*Which had nothing to do with my mentioning them on the blog - it was just because I was a member on the site. This blog WISHES it got endorsement deals.</span>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-534610203473192256.post-11020494674669696672013-09-10T09:26:00.000-06:002013-09-10T09:26:11.094-06:00Good Luck, HusbandsNothing you say after surgery will ever be as good as this.<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;">
<iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="480" src="//www.youtube.com/embed/IqebEymqFS8" width="640"></iframe></div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-534610203473192256.post-15842870327759421922013-09-06T09:59:00.000-06:002013-09-06T09:59:51.640-06:00And Everything NiceSince we're all on the same page about going ahead and diving head first into autumnal jubilation <strong><a href="http://verygray.blogspot.com/2013/09/fall-shaming.html" target="_blank">WITHOUT SHAME</a></strong>, I thought I'd share a little fall recipe I tried out last night, adapted slightly from <a href="http://www.annies-eats.com/2011/10/03/diy-pumpkin-spice-syrup-for-pumpkin-spice-lattes/" target="_blank"><strong>this one</strong></a> from Annie's Eats. <br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhctpGb7QjG8Eq4fKuEhBtZ_rGetotp4eQTd8BDFZ97HOifqfH3Iz0C2pzy1BlJUk-sxH2sbAS66mZUqlbSipWtPP3ovFfnfnlaaduI7VUu5z8ScYllf3oZghefsO_uU7kHHN8_VxidKMBH/s1600/026.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhctpGb7QjG8Eq4fKuEhBtZ_rGetotp4eQTd8BDFZ97HOifqfH3Iz0C2pzy1BlJUk-sxH2sbAS66mZUqlbSipWtPP3ovFfnfnlaaduI7VUu5z8ScYllf3oZghefsO_uU7kHHN8_VxidKMBH/s640/026.JPG" width="640" /></a></div>
<strong>Ingredients</strong><br />
<br />1½ cups water<br /> 1½ cups sugar<br />3 cinnamon sticks<br /> 1 tsp. ground nutmeg<br /> ½ tsp. ground ginger<br /> ½ tsp. ground cloves<br /> 3 tbsp. pumpkin puree<br />
<br />
<strong>Directions</strong><br />
<br />Combine the water and sugar in a medium saucepan and heat over medium-high heat, stirring occasionally, until the sugar has completely dissolved. Add the cinnamon sticks and whisk in the remaining spices and the pumpkin puree. Continue to cook for about 5 minutes, stirring frequently, without letting the mixture come to a boil. Remove from the heat and allow to cool for 10-15 minutes. Strain the syrup through a fine mesh strainer or cheesecloth and store in the refrigerator in your container of choice.<br />
<br />
When you're straining the syrup, it helps to use a spoon to stir the mixture and kind of help it through the strainer. Otherwise you might spend the rest of your life straining, and although this syrup is really good, I can't say it's worth taking up the rest of forever.<br />
<br />
This morning I put 2 tablespoons of syrup into the <a href="http://verygray.blogspot.com/2013/08/ten.html" target="_blank"><strong>homemade chai latte that is making my life so awesome</strong></a><strong> </strong>and it was pretty much the best decision I ever made. Except for maybe last night when I put the same amount into a plain old glass of milk and it kind of tasted like Cinnamon Toast Crunch cereal milk. Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-534610203473192256.post-48618672150786978052013-09-05T11:00:00.000-06:002013-09-05T11:01:16.716-06:00Fall ShamingI was reading <strong><a href="http://www.howsweeteats.com/2013/09/tuesday-things-115/" target="_blank">one of my favorite food blogs</a></strong> the other day and the author said something that troubled me. <br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="font-size: large;">"I’m not getting involved with consuming pumpkin things yet… but I cracked and lit some fall candles. I want to say it’s my favorite season, because it is, but how annoying is it that everyone in the world is like omgit’smyfavoriteseasonyayfall and it’s technically still summer?"</span></blockquote>
I don't blame the author of the blog, because frankly I am convinced she was sent from heaven to be my own personal Fairy Foodmother and is thereby incapable of doing wrong ever. <br />
<br />
I blame society for allowing this disgusting behavior to go on for so long. <br />
<br />
It's a real problem, and it's called fall shaming.<br />
<br />
Fall shaming is a label for social control of the enjoyment of autumn by exposing a person to shame for engaging in - or being perceived to engage in - premature, untimely or abnormally early behaviors that would usually be associated with the fall season. <br />
<br />
Friends, we cannot keep doing this to each other. It is time to break the shame cycle. <br />
<br />
So you drank a pumpkin spice latte when it was still 95 degrees outside? <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g_F2hpyjxhc" target="_blank"><strong>So what? Who cares?</strong></a><br />
<br />
So you started wearing scarves and boots in mid-July? DO YOU.<br />
<br />
So the <a href="http://verygray.blogspot.com/2010/12/our-tannen-is-bomb.html" target="_blank"><strong>giant wooden bear carved from a log</strong></a> in your living room is still wearing a Santa hat from last year because you never put it away and now you're sort of thinking it's close enough to Christmas that you might as well just leave it there? YOU'RE ME.<br />
<br />
Together, we can make a difference. <br />
<br />
Together, WE CAN BEAT THIS.<br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;">#fallyearlong</span>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-534610203473192256.post-83969284047249017902013-09-04T10:01:00.000-06:002013-09-04T10:01:53.522-06:00Egg-regiousAs I mentioned last week, I've been trying to do this whole couponing thing...with marginal success. However I DID score a buy one get one free dinner at Macaroni Grill last Friday night - which meant Gary and I could actually afford to go on a date.<br />
<br />
Did anyone else notice how I used the word <em>score</em> in reference to a coupon just now? I'm so embarrassing I can't even.<br />
<br />
Anyway, this weekend I had a coupon for a buy one get one free - or <em>BOGO</em> as we in the coupon biz call it* - breakfast sandwich at McDonald's. Turns out the secret to getting Gary to agree to buy fast food instead of making something at home is to tell him part of it's free. All these years...I had no idea.<br />
<br />
In order for the rest of this story to make sense, I should tell you that the coupon did stipulate that the coupon did not apply to items worth $1 or less.<br />
<br />
The following is an accurate account of what happened when I got to the drive-thru.<br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<b>McDonald's Employee: </b>Welcome to McDonald's. How may I help you?</blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<b>Me:</b> Hi, I have a buy one get one free breakfast sandwich coupon, so I'd like to get a bacon, egg and cheese biscuit and a sausage biscuit.</blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<b>McDonald's Employee: </b>Um, I don't think you can use that for the sausage biscuit because it's on the dollar menu.</blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<b>Me:</b> Oh...not even as the free one? </blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<b>McDonald's Employee: </b>No...I can give you a sausage <i>and egg</i> biscuit, but not a sausage biscuit.</blockquote>
I considered trying to explain to her that she was giving me a more expensive sandwich for free than the one I wanted - effectively costing McDonald's more money on top of saddling me with an unwanted egg patty - but I had no idea how long that would take and I was hungry, so instead Gary just got an extra layer of egg on his sandwich.<br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: x-small;">*I know. I'm literally gagging but I don't know how to make it stop.</span> Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-534610203473192256.post-80636367641280274752013-08-30T10:32:00.000-06:002013-08-30T10:32:46.737-06:00Ten These are the top ten things that are making my life awesome right now (in no particular order):<br />
<br />
<strong>Window A/C Unit</strong><br />
<br />
I seriously, seriously do not remember life before this thing. And I don't want to. <br />
<br />
Also I like to pronounce it like 50 Cent would: a-C! u-<strong>NIT!</strong><br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhdgQNlqeG2YI-bWANc_AqVytpecF9BlUifAzHMhpZDUv6i1ZzTDQghRUJCNdhFQ6PlfcmNtMJRnLpqdfCkf0CuwwU8jVU_BvogFV54VRBPjIjqvWkFkmfSdWASh7bTjO-7ZF6iTM6ymrZ2/s1600/g+unit.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhdgQNlqeG2YI-bWANc_AqVytpecF9BlUifAzHMhpZDUv6i1ZzTDQghRUJCNdhFQ6PlfcmNtMJRnLpqdfCkf0CuwwU8jVU_BvogFV54VRBPjIjqvWkFkmfSdWASh7bTjO-7ZF6iTM6ymrZ2/s320/g+unit.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://rapgenius.com/G-unit-g-unit-lyrics#note-1605087" target="_blank">via</a></td></tr>
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<strong>Free Baby Clothes</strong><br />
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When I found out I was having a girl, I swore I would not dress her in pink all the time. I've just never been a huge fan of the color pink* or anything super frilly.<br />
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Then I realized I was broke and suddenly frilly pink stuff didn't seem so bad. ESPECIALLY WHEN IT'S FREE. Like seriously...we haven't bought a single item of clothing and we don't plan to. Our friends and family have been so generous that Carolina already has more clothes than Gary and me combined. <br />
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<strong>Hamburgers</strong><br />
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All I want to do is eat hamburgers. I might be willing to make an exception...for a patty melt. Which is essentially a grilled cheese hamburger. Like <a href="http://thepioneerwoman.com/cooking/2012/08/patty-melts/" target="_blank"><strong>this one</strong></a> Gary made me last night along with the spicy fry sauce from <a href="http://thepioneerwoman.com/cooking/2010/08/mushroom-and-swiss-sliders-with-spicy-fry-sauce/" target="_blank"><strong>this recipe</strong></a>. I'm actually surprised I've been able to talk about anything else today IT WAS SO GOOD.<br />
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<strong>Wearing Dresses</strong> <br />
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Let's be honest, I should have just titled this one Not Wearing Pants in Public.<br />
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<strong>Tazo Chai Latte Concentrate</strong><br />
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Okay. I don't know why it has taken me so long to realize this - but yes I do, it's because I'm an idiot who loves wasting money. You can buy a carton of <a href="http://www.starbucksstore.com/tazo-chai-tea-latte-concentrate/011017406,default,pd.html?cm_mmc=CSE-_-ChannelAdvisor-_-GoogleProduct-_-Evergreen&CAWELAID=1309351769&catargetid=320012090000000015&cadevice={device}#" target="_blank"><strong>Tazo Chai Latte Concentrate</strong></a> at the grocery store for about the same price you would pay for a grande chai latte at Starbucks...AND IT IS **<strong>LITERALLY</strong>** THE EXACT SAME THING. You just mix equal parts concentrate and milk and put it over ice and then laugh to yourself smugly all the day long for being such a frugal smarty pants.<br />
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<strong>Gary Gray</strong><br />
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Gary is so excited about being a dad it kills me. Sometimes he just puts his hand on my belly and says, "Leeeeeeettle bayyyybeeeeeeeeee," and then I die of happiness.<br />
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An alternate version of this story is that he sometimes puts his face right up against the bump and says in his best James Earl Jones impression, "I AMM YOOUUUR FAAAATHEEERRRRRR," which is just about the greatest thing I can think of right now.<br />
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<strong>Watching the Belly</strong> <strong>Move</strong><br />
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Every so often (usually after I eat) I can see kicks from the outside and it is FASCINATING. If I'm this easily entertained by her in utero, I can't imagine how useless I'm going to be when she actually gets here.<br />
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<strong>Couponing...Sort Of</strong><br />
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This isn't consistently making my life awesome yet because I just started trying. But I DID use coupons at the grocery store for the first time in my life last night, which made me feel like a real adult. Pay no attention to the fact that I only saved a whopping $2.25 on my $50 grocery trip. <br />
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<strong>Classic Rock on Pandora</strong><br />
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Queen, AC/DC, Rolling Stones, Boston, Journey, Foreigner...it is <em>kind of</em> impossible to be in a bad mood when you're listening to this stuff. <br />
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<strong>Family</strong><br />
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I don't know if you know this...but my family is the ish. I just love them so much. Sometimes all this being an adult stuff is hard and it's nice to know there are still people there to take care of you...and gently tell you you're overreacting to the fact that you found a tick on your dog. Even though you touched it with your hand before you realized what it was because you'd never seen one before in real life.<br />
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">*Not to be confused with the artist Pink...of whom I have ALWAYS been a big fan. Especially back in the day when she used to do stuff like </span><a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=66LnhtnSoKc" target="_blank"><strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">this</span></strong></a><span style="font-size: x-small;"> on the regular.</span>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1