Pinterest Runs My Life.

I did two more Pinterest projects this weekend because - let's be honest - having all those uncompleted DIY pins out there makes me feel like I'm living a lie. 'Cause Lord knows everyone else makes every single thing they pin. I GOTTA KEEP UP!

The first one shouldn't even count because it took me all of ten minutes and I did it while I was on the phone with my mom. By the time she had finished telling me about the man in a skirt she saw at Walgreens this morning, it was done. (Original project can be found here.)

Now the next time I'm being chased by murderers, I won't have to spend so much time trying to figure out which key belongs to my house.

This $2 bottle of nail polish might just save my life. Or chip off all over the inside of my purse. Only time will tell. 

I offered to do the same for Gary's keys, but he turned me down. Weird.

The other project has actually kind of been plaguing me. It's a combination of this project (sewing envelope pillow cases) and this project (stenciling words onto the pillow cases with a fabric marker).

The stenciling was the fun part. I knew I wanted to put something funny, so I settled on a quote from Bridesmaids. Sarah gets all the credit for being a genius and coming up with the idea to add pictures. 

The sewing portion...was not so fun. Here's something you might not know about me: I suck at sewing.  Oh, I might talk a big game about how many curtains I've made, but I'm gonna let you in on a little secret: Curtains are the easiest possible thing you could make. If you have a sewing machine and two arms, you can make curtains. (Honestly you could probably do it with one arm. What can I say, I don't like to discriminate.) 

Anyway, I first bought fabric for this project like...six months ago. Then I cut it wrong. Then I bought more fabric. Then it sat on my guest bed for three months. Then I waited until my mom came to visit so she could show me how to do something other than a straight stitch on my sewing machine. 

So you can imagine that when I finally finished them, I was feeling pretty accomplished. That is, until I went to put the pillows inside and one of the seams ripped out. I screamed a lot and threw some stuff. Then I fixed it and here they are! 

They're not very well made so no one is allowed to touch them ever lest more of the seams be ripped out. 

Here they are precariously close to my dogs:

It's cool; my dogs are really well trained.

Ha. Hahaha. Hahahahahahahaha. 

Just kidding. I found them mostly asleep and only left the pillows there long enough to take this picture.