For those of you who thought I was kidding when I said I didn’t know how to make boxed macaroni and cheese when I got married...I wasn’t. But I was determined to learn, because somewhere in the back of my strange little mind was a tiny voice telling me that becoming a good cook was crucial to the success of my marriage.
After the first month or so, I was sure Gary was going to leave me at any moment. Do yourselves a favor: when you come across a recipe for goat cheese and asparagus pasta and you think it sounds delicious and interesting, run. Run for your life. It is the opposite of delicious, and in the immortal words of my beloved cousin Eric, “You should never eat something because it looks ‘interesting’.”
Since then, I’ve managed to get a few passable meals under my belt. Unfortunately, in the process of trying to learn to cook lots of different things, I think I inadvertently set the dinner bar a little too high. I had learned how to make all these awesome recipes, so I fell into a pattern of making a big meal every night of the week, which is expensive and exhausting. Little did I know at the time that the Great Lasagna Fallout would change everything.
It happened last week. Gary and I went to the store to get stuff to make dinner for some of our friends for his birthday, along with a couple other things we needed around the house. When the cashier told us our total was $200, we both fell to the ground, shaking uncontrollably and foaming at the mouth. We usually spend between $100 and $150 for an entire week’s worth of groceries, so we sort of died a little inside at the thought of spending that much for one meal. Granted, it was a giant meal, but it was still unnerving. (Speaking of which, would you like some leftover lasagna? Anyone? Please? We’ll pay you...in lasagna.)
In an effort to balance things out, I planned the cheapest meals I could think of for this week, and whaddya know? Our grocery bill was $62. Egg based meals, where have you been all my life? You’re so cheap and delicious! I love you, and I’m going to keep you forever.
Another thing I’ve discovered this week is that apparently, Gary and Sarah are both willing to eat food that hasn’t been sautéed in truffle oil! I just wish I would have figured this out earlier, 'cause then we might have been able to keep our electricity on last month.