Tuesday, June 12, 2012

The One Where I Encourage Kids to Push Each Other Down

While Theresa and Calvin were here, we went to the Cheyenne Mountain Zoo because it is awesome. I'm particularly impressed by this picture Theresa took with her cell phone:

One of the reasons I love going to the zoo (besides the obvious fact that I get to see hippos and penguins IN THE SAME ROOM) is that there are always so many adorable kids there. As I was trying to decide on which one I wanted to take home with me*, I noticed the wide array of parenting styles that were being implemented around me.

We saw one woman unashamedly leading her three daughters in a song about bears (the one that goes The other day/I met a bear/Out in the woods/Oh WAY out there) and IT WAS ADORABLE. She must have known everyone could hear her, but all she cared about was that her kids were having a good time.

Later on, we saw a young dad in the monkey house carrying his infant son over to the glass so he could get a better look at a gorilla. That kid probably won't remember that he went to the zoo when he was six months old, but his dad was so excited and it was absolutely precious.

There was this one couple, though, that was driving me absolutely crazy. They had three boys at whom they were constantly cussing and yelling** and it was kind of ruining the wolf exhibit for me, but whatever. I may not have kids, but I do have a mom, and I don't ever remember her screaming at us in public. Her disciplinary method of choice was, in my opinion, much more effective. She would kneel down until she reached our eye level, gently put her hands on both our shoulders and whisper something to the effect of, "You're gonna die tonight." Worked every time.

Anyway, later on in the day we bumped into them again just as the mom was (surprise!) yelling at one of the older ones for pushing the youngest one down. She ended her long string of berating comments with, "What is wrong with you?! He's only two! Why would you push him down like that?!"

His response was pure gold. "I thought he was three."

I didn't see what happened next because I had to duck behind a giant fake tree to hide my uncontrollable (and wildly inappopriate) laughter, but I can only hope that kid held his head a little higher for the rest of the day. Way to go, kiddo.

*That's how it works, right? You just pick one out like an orange? I think the trick is to toss and catch them a couple times in your hand to see which one's the heaviest.

**At one point I heard the mom say, "Don't make me hesitate!" with a sassy head-bob/finger-snap combo, and I just couldn't stop thinking to myself, "You are in charge of someone's life. Awesome."

1 comment:

Erin said...

This may be one of the greatest things you have ever written.

Please go to the Zoo more often so you can share these gems with us again :)