Wednesday, August 14, 2013

That Can Be Arraigned...

Yesterday I had to stand in front of an honorable judge and say the word GUILTY.

I told you guys about the speeding ticket I got a few weeks ago and how I had an expired insurance card, right?

Yesterday was my court date. What I was expecting was to go downtown, show an office clerk proof that I had insurance coverage at the time of the incident, pay my fine and get back to work.

What actually happened was that I had to go into an actual COURTROOM for my ARRAIGNMENT.

As I sat there listening to my rights and all the ways I could request a trial by jury, I started to feel really uncomfortable about the way I was dressed.*

What? It was nerd day at work. Don't act like the Christian youth organization you work for doesn't do crap like this.

Anyway, I was there for an hour and it sucked. It just made me feel so...dirty. Like a criminal.

I mean I guess I did break the law. BUT YOU GUYS KNOW WHAT I MEAN!

I am, in general, a rule-following, cop-respecting, non-littering teacher's pet of a citizen. I brake for pedestrians! I shovel my sidewalk! I return ALL of the mail that comes to my house that is addressed to someone other than me (even when it is a really interesting-looking Amazon package that I would like to open just to see what it is) - and there is a LOT OF IT.


Hmph. If you'll excuse me, I'm gonna go pout in the corner until somebody brings me an ice cream cone.

*While I would love to let you all think that I actually have the balls to go out in public like this, I'd like to state for the record that I did have the sense to fix my hair and remove the tape from my glasses before attending court. But I was still wearing jeans and flip flops, which I really did feel weird about.

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